Reader Question:

I was solitary for years! I’m prepared to have a relationship again, and that I’m not getting younger! I’ve met an excellent man. Both of us have-been widowed for more than six years. We set my pictures away however my memories.

I am concerned because they have their girlfriend’s picture hanging across fireplace, in which he requested me to believe that it will not be removed. I understand he liked this lady, and I also would never ask him to deny it.

I do not feel comfortable. I think i shall feel i am the next individual. I am not sure just how to experience it. May I find some guidance here?

–Alondra H. (Montana)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

This is a fragile question and something that I have a large number. I would like you to definitely reframe your own concept of this photo. The woman above the fireplace is not his live, inhaling wife. The woman is symbolic of the warm connection this guy has the ability to develop.

He takes his commitments very really. This is a good thing! He may also be concerned about the emotions of mature young ones exactly who might see the missing photo because their mother being changed.

When I was a development reporter, i did so a profile on a resigned Air Force colonel that has generated the hop to Web business person. Their girlfriend managed all of our tv crew at their home so when I inquired if she could provide us with an on-camera “soundbyte” about their home existence, she really gracefully declined by outlining which they were newlyweds so there had been an other woman who’d stood behind that man for 28 many years before she passed away of breast cancer.  This made the colonel give the girl a large embrace and insist that she look with him on camera.

My guidance for your requirements: cannot check their late spouse as a possibility. See her as an ally. Removing an image wont eliminate his recollections, but it might drive a wedge in a budding relationship with a commitment-oriented guy.

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